Archive for August, 2010

What Makes a Man a Bad F*&%……From The Female’s Prospective!

Ok Ladies, my last post was catered to the men and how they really feel about us in bed.  They went in on us ladies and I thank each and every last one of my contributors because we can’t get better at anything if we don’t know what we need to improve on.  So, the guys had their chance to vent now it’s our turn.  I must say that I’m very disappointed in the number of women that responded but I’m grateful for the few comments I did receive because they’re really good!  My good lady friends have spoken and let’s hear what they have to say in their opinion on what makes a man a bad sex partner!

I think you all know that I hold nothing back on my site and I give it to you straight and to the point and this one is no different.  Let’s GO!!!!

Patricia Lee, Eastern Shore, VA

“When they change positions every 2 mins. and when they stop every 6 strokes to stop from cumin fast.”

She makes a wonderful point guys!  First off guys let me say that I understand why you change positions as often as you do, if you do.  It’s because the vajussy that you’re in is so good that you can’t handle it, or you’re just very weak, wack and haven’t gotten any in a minute (take your pick).  Let me explain what switching positions and stopping every 6 strokes does for us women…..NOT A DAMN THING!!! You’re not giving us enough time to enjoy the position, to feel the position to allow your dick to massage our G-Spot enough to even give us an orgasm.  Which is why it’s much harder for us to cum.  Think about it, no matter what the position is, guys you are still getting stroked up and down giving you the same feeling the entire time.  For women the change of position or stopping could prevent us from having an orgasm because our sexual buttons are no longer being stimulated and then we have to start all over and build back up to our orgasm.  It’s just a turn off guys.

Here’s how you can save yourself.  Jerking off before you have sex can help prevent you from prematurely ejaculating during intercourse.  You can also use masturbation as a means of practice.  How?  You can practice not coming, when you’re on the verge of coming try to fight the feeling and use those same practices while you’re having sex.

There are also creams and gels to help you stay in the vajussy longer.  The creams will help desensitize your penis, allowing you to live in the sauce longer than usual.  You can find these creams over the counter in sex shops, Ricki’s and in your local drug stores.  Ginseng, is another method of giving you more stamina and energy (they come in drops as well as pills).

You can also practice something called the “Squeeze Method.”  When you feel like you’re about to come, squeeze the tip of your penis firmly for 10 to 20 seconds.  This will prolong ejaculation.  And as always if you prolong the four-play session and please the hell out of your woman, we may over look the fact that you can’t hang.  Remember, you can’t lack in both areas!

Christina Simon, Eastern Shore of VA

“I’m going to say a small packaged man. Sorry size does matter in my book. If I cant feel ya I can’t be with you lmao. If its the right size I can make it good cuz I will lead, but if it’s too small my stomach and head will hurt, I’m out lol.”

Guys you’ve heard this soooo many times.  Just in case you don’t know, let me remind you that we don’t give a flying crap about the motion of the ocean, if your boat isn’t large enough then we’re not going to sail that ship.  Size really does matter to us women.  Why?  A small penis effects our mental and our physical state.  For example, if we’re involved in a hot and heavy session of four play and our undies are soaked with our juices and we’re ready to go and then we place our hand on your small ass penis, our vajussy will dry up in a second.  Women who are extremely nice may continue and decide to have sex with you out of sympathy but strong minded, vocal women will let you know it ain’t happening.

Unfortunately men there is really no cure for the small dick disease.  I have yet to hear of one cream, oil or pump that actually enlarges a man’s penis but if you don’t believe me feel free to try.  You can find all types of products online and I refuse to look up any for you because they don’t work.  BUT here is a piece of advice you better learn how to eat the vajussy like you’ve never eaten it before, you better become the king of eating Vajussy, you better eat it so well that the woman forgets all about the fact that you have the smallest penis she’s ever seen.

Joi De Vivre, New York, NY

“If he sweats profusely and humps like a jack rabbit, all the while keeping his eyes closed lol.”

Joi actually gives me two problems in this one statement so I’ll start off with the sweating.  Some men can’t help the sweat, but I understand that too much sweat starts to feel a little disgusting.  When my guy sweats, he sweats just enough and leaves a light coat of it on my body and I think that’s sexy.  But if it’s dripping everywhere that may become a little unbearable.  There’s not much you can do but I suggest you keep a towel by the bed so that you can wipe the sweat off in between pumps.  Try having sex in the shower, if you sweat she’ll never know because you both are already wet….. 🙂  Ladies if you have this issue and are afraid to say it to your man, try suggesting the shower that way you’re not criticizing him and he’ll think you just want to be freaky.

2nd issue, the infamous Jack Rabbit pump.  For those of you that don’t know what that means, it means pumping extremely fast. Men I’ll tell you this right now, pumping really fast is selfish, immature and shows the lack of your sexual skills.  Let’s start off with selfish, we all know the quicker you pump, the quicker you come which then leaves us upset, frustrated and most of all orgasmless!  Immature can also fall under selfish because only an immature person will be for self during sex.  The more mentally mature you are the more you understand that your job is to please your partner.  LACK OF SEXUAL SKILLS: If you knew anything at all about sex you wouldn’t perform this horrible move.  It also let’s me know that you know no other moves but this one.  It does nothing for us women and it fucks our heads up.

Ladies, I blame this on you too because you should learn how to be more vocal about what you want in bed, stop him, grab him by the waist and guide his ass the way you want him to.  If you’re too afraid to do that tell him to stop because you a fool if you lay there and allow him to jack hammer your Vajussy.

MEN please know that we HATE this type of stroke and if you’re doing because you’ve seen it done in porn, do me a favor and take a look at the woman’s face I can promise you she’s not enjoying it.   And guess what?  We talk about it too, we’ll go back and tell our homegirls what a horrible fuck you were, I have a homegirl right now who talks about how much she hates it when a man fast pumps.  So please just take my advice and I’ll promise you, your lady will love you a little bit more.

I would like to thank Patrica Lee, Chrissy Simon & Joi De Vivre (I don’t think that’s her real last name….LOL) for contributing to my post.  I write for you all and I love to write what you want me to write and I especially love it it when you contribute to the post. Please leave a comment and subscribe to my blog.

Until Next Post……Love, Peace and Freakiness!!!

What Makes a Woman A bad F*#K!….From The Man’s Perspective

Ladies, today I’ve decided to become the voice of the men, because so many of them believe that I’m one sided & I like to see myself as an equal minded person.  So I threw out the question to them “What makes a woman a bad lay?”  Aka bad fuck or bad vajussy.  I asked my gentlemen friends on facebook and twitter and I got some very interesting responses.  I told the guys I would take their responses, present them to the ladies while giving helpful tips on how NOT to be a bad lay.

To my surprise :O, most of the men said the same thing which shocked me because it’s the number 1 rule in sex.  Ladies shame on you, I curse you with the bad sex stick for breaking this simple ass rule.  But I’m not going to curse you just yet, let’s start off with a different one.

Jason Brown, 29 from the Eastern Shore of Va said: that he hates when a woman doesn’t smell good and if you smell bad you should wash.  (Believe me he didn’t put it as nicely as I did).

Ladies I agree with Jason you should be taking better care of yourself hygienically, but if washing is not the issue there are ways to get rid of the bad odor.  First of all ladies know your body and understand your body because our bodies can be very weird and react differently with certain things.  It could be several other reasons why you have a bad odor other than being trifling.  If you are having an odor issue, I strongly suggest you make an appointment with your OBGYN ASAP!  Please don’t be embarrassed because you’re not the only woman having this issue.  You may have an STD and that’s something washing can’t control.

For those of you who don’t have a STD, you may have something called Bacterial Vaginosis (BV) which is the imbalance of bacterial in the vaginal which happens to be the most common vaginal infection.  Women have natural bacteria in the vagina, but when there’s a build up of bad bacteria all hell hell breaks loose.  LISTEN UP MEN!  This can effect all women clean, dirty, classy and trashy.  So ease up on them and encourage them to go see a doctor.  The doctor will either give you antibiotics or a gel to help balance out the bacteria.  It may come back but there are things you can do to help it not return.  1. NO colored wash cloths.  The dye in the cloths can irritate your vagina and throw your balance off.  2.  Do not wear thongs every day!  Its almost as if you’re wiping from back to front and we all know that’s a no no.  3. Stay away from wearing tight clothes every day.  Let your vajussy breathe sometimes.  4.  Incorporate yogurt in your diet, it’s very good for women.  5. Take a daily vitamin, a probiotic called Acidophilus.  It’s like yogurt in a pill.  6.  Don’t keep wet, or damp undies on.  That’s a growing place for bacterial.  7.  If you know your body, know the different condoms and how you react to them because they can make a difference also.  There are others but this should put you on the right path.

Jonathan Smith, 29 says: “When a chick braggs on how good her stuff is and when you get it the shit dry and wack and you can’t hit it the way u want to cause they say it hurts.”

Ladies always remember: Actions speak Louder than Words!  Explore your own body before you go bragging.  If you can’t get your own vajussy wet how do you expect someone else to get it wet and if it’s not wet how can you possibly think the man can enjoy it.  If you know that you’re dry ladies there are some over the counter products (water base is best) that can help you with that.

Causes of vaginal dryness:

Your sensitive vaginal chemistry may be reacting to another kind of chemistry?in harsh alkaline soaps, for example. Or you may be drying up as part of an allergicresponse to perfumes or dyes. As you get closer to the years of menopause, lowered estrogen levels may also cause dryness of the vagina. And certain skin conditions may interfere with vaginal lubrication.

Symptom Relief:

Change up your soap.  The vagina is not meant to be sterile but I’m glad someone decided to say hey, I think we should wash this thing…..LOL.  You should try to use hypoallergenic soap with no dyes or fragrances.  The best is probably Ivory but I like the original Dove as my personal choice.  That means, no body washes, peppermint soaps, caress or any of those perfume soaps.  Speaking of perfumes, don’t spray any perfume in or around the vajussy BAD IDEA!

Your laundry detergent and toilet paper may also have an effect.  Only use soft, white unscented toilet paper.  Even cheap hard white toilet paper can be bad.  If it’s caused by your detergent you may need to switch brands until you find something that matches your body’s chemistry.

Again, LEARN your body.  Learn what makes you lubricate (moist/wet).  If you’re laying on your back most of the lubricate can fall to the back causing painful intercourse.  Before you begin try dipping your fingers in and lubricating the outside of the vagina.

Ladies……The more you have sex, the more lubrication you make!  So have fun with making lubrication if the problem persists check with your doctor because he or she may be able to tell you the exact problem.

The biggest issue of All…….DRUM ROLL PLEASE!!!!!!

This was said by: Jason Brown, Derek Reynolds, Rome Johnson, Deonndray Harmon, & Travis Tyrone-Davis aka @MRstunz (follow him, comedy for days).

The wackest sex of all is women who just lay there and not do anything!  WHAT?!  Ladies, you know good ass damn well that, that’s the number one rule to sex period.  Don’t you hate it when we’re on top and the man isn’t doing anything but laying there?  It’s the same damn thing.  Sex should be 50/50.  He thrust you push, he licks you suck.  Plain and simple no questions asked.  And I say these things giving that you are having sex with someone you’re in a relationship with and care for deeply because you can’t just lick and suck on everyone.  I see sex as a competition with myself and my main goal is to please the man and make him come harder than the last time.  So here’s a tip ladies, stop being lazy selfish ass women and if you don’t know what you’re doing, you do the opposite of him, if he’s withdrawing the penis you push towards it because think about it if you do the same moves as him the penis will never stay in AND it just feels natural.  Be smart ladies!

I would just like to thank Darrell Conquest & Adam Cottrell  for also giving me their thoughts.  They both believe that communication is the key and makes for better sex.  I agree with both of them because if something is wrong or not right in the bedroom you better believe Tony and I talk about it and we fix it.

Ladies I’m still waiting on your complaints on what makes a man a bad lay.  As soon as I get them I can write an article for us!  OH and my girl Angie B asks if the girl is a bad lay, then why do you men keep sleeping with them?  Answer that!!!

Thanks for reading guys,

Love, Peace and Freakiness!!!

RL Wynder