Archive for June 1st, 2010

What Exactly is Tantric Sex?

Most of you know that I started shooting a new show this week so I’m going to be having a rough time balancing work, writing for the blog site and writing the new Risque novel.  I promise I’m going to be trying my best to please you all and to keep you on your Risque fix.

Today’s topic is very interesting. It’s something I’ve never done before but wouldn’t mind doing it, I just know it’ll be hard to find a guy who’ll be willing to try this with me and fully commit to it.  Before I do anything I always like to do my research, this way we can all learn about this at the same time.

I first heard about this particular type of sex through Diddy.  Way before I was on twitter Diddy twitted that he was in his 35th hour of  marathon sex.  Do I believe he would pick up the phone during sex?  Yes.  Would I have smacked the beJesus out of him if I was the woman?  Yes.  I became curious, did a little research, found it to be too confusing and soon forgot about it until Dawn & Que tweeted about it.

What am I talking about my peeps?  I’m talking about Tantric Sex which is the slow sustained form of sexual intercourse founded on Indian mysticism.  We’re going to take a deeper look into what it is and the benefits from it.  I think we can all agree when we have sex we all want the same outcome, to feel good and for lack of better words to bust a nut.  Tantric Sex is just the opposite.  Your goal during a session of Tantric Sex should be to prolong the orgasm in order to increase your sexual energy and intimacy with your partner.

Why would anyone want to do that?  Have sex and not have an ending point?  It’s because Tantric Sex allows you to feel and focus on all of the other feelings and emotions that happen before the orgasm.  Even though Tantric Sex can last up to an insanely number of hours, another one of your goals is to preserve your energy.  When you experience an orgasm or release any amount of come, you are releasing energy from your body.  Don’t worry it is possible for men to have an orgasm with out releasing any fluid, but normally that comes with being a pro at Tantric Sex.  A man must be able to have enough control mentally and physically to have what they call a dry orgasm, on purpose.

I like to describe Tantric Sex as sexual yoga, because it’s based on breathing to cycle energy.  You breath in each other’s air to create energy.  Sort of like sexual photosynthesis (without the light).  It involves a lot of conscious breathing, eye contact and visualization.  It’s connecting spiritually with your partner.  It sounds like hard work and it is but here are a few beginner points if you’re interested in pursuing in this spiritual sexual act.


You should be in a comfortable area a place where you are most relaxed.  You should accent the room with candles, flowers & dim lighting and anything sensual.  Anything distracting such as the tv, cell phones and clocks should be turned off.  It’s ok to have music playing softly in the background.  Scents are very important to sensuality so it’ll be a plus to have some oils, scented candles or incense burning as well.

Concentrate on Breathing

Breathing allows you to easily sync with your partner which is why breathing is so important in Tantric Sex.  One of the easiest way to do this is to have the woman straddle the man’s lap and your breathing should be opposite.  Meaning while she’s inhaling, he should be exhaling causing you to breath in each other’s breath, therefore creating energy.

Keep Eye Contact

This is also another way to stay sexually connected and intimate.  You know how they say the eyes are the windows to your soul.  Imagine making love to our partner seeing their soul and experiencing what they’re feeling.  It’ll only heighten your sensuality driving you both to a new level of ecstasy.  It’s a little difficult to do being that people naturally close their eyes when something feels good or bad.  Just try and stay conscious of keeping your eyes open.

Take Your Time

In my opinion sex is better when you take your time, and I’m obviously not the only person that believes this.  Four play is very important when it comes to Tantric sex.  Take your time with it, explore every inch of each other’s body.  The longer the four play the better, because the slow build helps men control longevity and piques women’s arousal.  The act of four-play is to build energy and that’s what Tantric Sex is all about.  So the longer you build your energy the longer your session will last.

Good Luck and I really hope you step outside of your sexual box and try something new.  After researching this topic I believe it can redefine sex.  If you’re tired of the old get in get out, humpty dumpty acts of regular sex, I challenge you to challenge yourselves and try Tantric Sex.  As soon as I post this, you better believe I’m starting my campaign to convince my boo to try it with me.  I know it’ll be a lil harder to convince the men but ladies give it a try!