As I sit in the office waiting on my burger, onion rings and black & white shake a great idea popped into my head.  Not really popped I’ve actually been wanting to write about this for sometime.  In my opinion the number 2 reason why relationships end is because of social networks like (Facebook, Twitter, Myspace  & for all you wack ass people….Black Planet).

Let’s be honest…….How many arguments have you ever gotten into with your boo over something that either you or someone else said on your page.  It could be something as small as “Hi! Haven’t heard from you in a while.”  LOL next thing you know…..”Who is this bitch?”  I’m laughing because it reminds me of Martin’s, You So Crazy; when the coat check lady asked for the jackets.  Anyway, the majority of you have gotten into arguments.  Luckily my man is too much of a private person for any of those sites so I don’t really have to worry about him.  I will tell you that I sometimes even hate to see my ex-boos with other girls or making sexy comments toward other women (just being honest).

So how harmful can a social network be to a relationship?  I’m glad you asked.  First off I think its a horrible idea to be friends with someone you’re seeing, unless the relationship is new.  I say that because I believe we should know who we’re dealing with and I’m a spier I will find out everything I can about someone when I first start seeing them.  You find out exactly who a person is through social networks, through them, their pictures and most importantly their friends.

If you already know the person and their friends I suggest you not be his friend.  Why?  Because you’re going to be looking at every girl’s page at every girl’s comment wondering who they are and why they’re commenting on your man’s page.  Right now at this moment I’m speaking to the ladies because this is what we do, I know I’m a woman.  Like I mentioned before I don’t have to worry about this situation but I’ve definitely done some “Research” for my friends and with my friends.  We’ve even figured out passwords…LOL

I know you men are thinking that’s messed up, she should trust me.  Men, women are curious beings by nature and if it’s nothing there to find you should be alright.  Listen, I personally don’t think a social site is worth your relationship and if it fails because of it your relationship wasn’t strong in the first place.  I know plenty of people who’ve had relationships end because of Facebook.  Sometimes it’s unfortunate because you get those conniving women who have nothing else better to do but break up your relationship.

It irritates the crap out of me to see two women go back and forth on FB about a man that obviously the both of you have been with.  The whole while their friends are cheering and motivating them to act more ignorant.  We never see two men do that.  The two women should come together and bust him.  Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.  Now you not only lost your man but you put your business on front street and you look ignorant as hell doing so (I’ll blog about this at another time).

So my suggestion to you is to not be friends with your boo if you are the type of person to feed in to negativity.  Haters are every where and a lot of them reside on FB.  If you’re the type of person who likes to throughly investigate and ask question and can let silly stuff roll off your back then go head and be friends.  One of my good friends is now engaged and refuses to be FB friends with her fiance just because she just doesn’t want to entertain the negativity if it presented it self.  Of course I took her advice because she’s where I will someday like to be, married (well about to be).

The purpose of a social network is to be sociable, to have the chance to communicate with people you don’t see on the regular.  Hopefully you see your significant other on the regular and if you do answer this.  What’s the point of being his friend on a social network?  He’s already your friend in real life and you know more about his whereabouts then his friends on FB or whatever site.  You have his number and address for God’s sake you don’t need to be in every single part of his life.

To each it’s own but please think about it before you become friends with your lover.  And yall know me if you have any good Social Site/Relationship stories please share at risquethenovel@gmail.com.  Also don’t forget to subscribe to this blog for all of your Risque updates! Just click on “Sign Me Up”

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  • Comments (3)
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    • May 12th, 2010

    I see where you are coming from. Everyone uses FB for a different purpose. Me…..to link up with people I dont see often, see pictures of family and to challenge people to think differently. With that said I dont see a problem with being friends with your mate on a social networking site IF———-YOU ARE MATURE, CONFIDENT, AND SECURE WITH WHO YOU ARE AND IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP! So I’d say BEWARE! LOL!!! I was like what you described as a spier…lol I had an Ex call me Hacker Cracker…lmbo…But back then I was an insecure girl….Now I am becoming a woman of integrity! But Hacker Cracker can hack into WHATEVER!!!!!!LOL

  2. I agree with this 100%! Luckily, in my relationships none of the guys have been into social networking sites so they weren’t interested in what I was doing on them. They trusted that I wasn’t into the whole internet cheating thing. Great post!

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