RELATIONSHIPS

SOMETHING NEW

For my first real blog post I decided to write about something personal.  I want my readers to be able to share anything with me so I’ve decided to share something about me that I know a lot of you can relate to.  Leave a comment, tell me what you think.

When most of us hear “Something New” we think about the 2006 movie starring Sanaa Lathan and Simon Baker.  We’re all familiar with the movie, Sanaa’s character Kenya a powerful attorney has a hard time finding love with the brothers.  The reasons being is because of her time consuming career and long list of qualities.  She unexpectedly falls in love with “Something New,” a white man.

That movie really got me thinking.  As a 27 year old living in the Big Apple finding a man became a little more difficult than I’ve ever imagined.  Even though I’m in a city full of gorgeous black men, I too have a list of qualities that a man must possess before I even give them a chance.   My list isn’t any where near outrageous as Chilli’s but I do understand where she’s coming from because I believe good women deserve to have the best and no less.

I started thinking about my future and having children and I realized I better jump into the dating game and eliminate the men in my life that I know I’ll never marry.  At this point I’m still unwilling to cross out anything on my list.  My list is actually quite simple, the man must be: Handsome, Funny, family oriented, and believes in God oh and have a nice body (see not that bad).

So check this out! One day while I’m attending my Boot Camp class at the local Y this man decides to bother me, talking me to death while I’m trying to work out.  I didn’t think much of him during our first encounter (let him tell it I was the one pushing up on him).  As time went on  I started to take notice of  his banging ass body.  I started paying more attention to him throughout our classes.  As I did my “girl push-ups” I watched him do his push-ups while his sweat hung off the tip of his nose.  I started imagining me under him while he did his push-ups….LOL (Hey I’m just being honest, I have a hell of an imagination).  What I’m trying to say is that I began noticing all of his handsome features, from his height, muscles, beautiful smile, out going personality, and his sense of humor.

After weeks of flirting he finally gave me his card and I gave him a call that same night.  I called him so soon because believe it or not he had tried to talk to me 2 years ago, I didn’t recognize him but I remembered his card.  We ended up going on a date the next night, May 20, 2009 and surprisingly I’m still with this man today damn near a year later.

Most of you who follow me on twitter know all about Tony.  Tony is my “Something New.”  No, I didn’t go the Sanaa route and swirl.  I went the other route, the other “Something New.”  Tony is 46 years old (45 when I met him), 18 years my senior.  When I first met him I had no idea he was that old I thought he was 35 (God has blessed him with great genes).

I thought about calling it off for the simple fact that he’s one year younger than my parents.  But I had already gotten the chance to know him and he’s a great person, mixed with a lil crazy.  I’m able to check everything off of my list with him.  If I’m going to be with a “Something New,” regardless of age or color he’s going to be the BEST “Something New.”  I have the best looking 46 year old man ever hands down, who treats me well!  Yeah we have our little spats, but what couple doesn’t.

I encourage you men and women if you’re not finding what you’re looking for, step a little outside your box.  Date someone outside of your age group or your race, because you can be just like Kenya and I and find love in an unexpected place, you can find your “Something New.

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  • Comments (2)
    • Luvnbtc
    • April 27th, 2010

    Your absolutely right!!! We as women always have these outrageous qualities for a man and as a result we end up with nothing. Sometimes we need to think outside the box and try “something new” you never know what you are missing out on because of your silly little checklist.

    • T. FAE
    • April 26th, 2010

    what can I say? You hit the nail on the head when it comes to race and dating. However, i will say if the woman/man is 18 dating someone 20 years older, is a different sitaution. You are older and know who you are…no one at 18 knows who they really are yet. I never had a preference when it came to race…my family just cared if he had a J.O.B..lol. I just happen to fall in love with the half white/half japanese guy. We had instant connection and there is nothing you can do when that love bug comes along. I have dated all types of men. Before my fiance’, this black guy and I were going real hard, but I was looking for more and it just happen that the white guy came into the picture and showed commitement to me. It is what it is…

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